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[oh. wu xian is--
it's strangely overwhelming being the entire focus wu xian. no limbs splayed out, nothing played with in his hands. just sitting proper and calm and staring at him with that gaze that no one seems to ever truly escape.
wang ji centers himself, allows the anger to wash through and out, and his jealousy to cool before answering.]
I apologize.
it's strangely overwhelming being the entire focus wu xian. no limbs splayed out, nothing played with in his hands. just sitting proper and calm and staring at him with that gaze that no one seems to ever truly escape.
wang ji centers himself, allows the anger to wash through and out, and his jealousy to cool before answering.]
I apologize.
[ pain is the last thing that Wu Xian is in right now. he is so calm, but there is also something warm and bright gathering in the core of him. part of him is aware he should focus on that, maybe look at it a little closer to figure out just what is going on, but he doesn't want to think. not right now.]
Mn.
[ eyes fluttering closed a little, Wei Ying smiles softly and shakes his head minutely. he wants to say more but his tongue feels too heavy. he tries again, voice quiet and a little warm around the edges as he speaks.]
No, not at all.
Mn.
[ eyes fluttering closed a little, Wei Ying smiles softly and shakes his head minutely. he wants to say more but his tongue feels too heavy. he tries again, voice quiet and a little warm around the edges as he speaks.]
No, not at all.
[ sorry, what was that now?
Wei Ying blinks, multiple times, because-- Wang Ji just??? apologized??? that doesn't make sense to him. his mouth opens then snaps shut again, nothing coming out in the interim, and he looks a little stunned.]
Wait, why are you apologizing?
Wei Ying blinks, multiple times, because-- Wang Ji just??? apologized??? that doesn't make sense to him. his mouth opens then snaps shut again, nothing coming out in the interim, and he looks a little stunned.]
Wait, why are you apologizing?
Good.
[Wang Ji doesn't want to hurt Wu Xian at all, not now or ever. He hopes the peace settling in the room with them also eases any ails or sadness Wu Xian may have carried in with him, allow them to dissipate with the gentle breeze. For this moment, all other matters can wait at the door.
Wang Ji returns to combing higher up this time, each stroke deliberate but careful not to tug if the teeth meet resistance. He brushes through the hair of Wu Xian's scalp with his fingers first and then the comb, to find the trouble spots early. And, perhaps, to enjoy the briefest of contact with Wu Xian. It will soon be done and he doesn't want to waste the opportunity.]
[Wang Ji doesn't want to hurt Wu Xian at all, not now or ever. He hopes the peace settling in the room with them also eases any ails or sadness Wu Xian may have carried in with him, allow them to dissipate with the gentle breeze. For this moment, all other matters can wait at the door.
Wang Ji returns to combing higher up this time, each stroke deliberate but careful not to tug if the teeth meet resistance. He brushes through the hair of Wu Xian's scalp with his fingers first and then the comb, to find the trouble spots early. And, perhaps, to enjoy the briefest of contact with Wu Xian. It will soon be done and he doesn't want to waste the opportunity.]
[For being jealous. For not being as usually centered. Wu Xian always seems to get this rise out of him no matter what. But saying any of those things will only earn more of a reaction from Wu Xian.
So Wang Ji nods, collected and calm once more.]
For accusing you of sitting improperly
[Worst lie in the history of lies.]
So Wang Ji nods, collected and calm once more.]
For accusing you of sitting improperly
[Worst lie in the history of lies.]
[ keep this up and there is no way that Wei Ying will even remember that they are supposed to be going to a funeral. he won't remember that there is a world beyond the feeling of Lan Zhan's fingers against his scalp and the soft sounds of jade against his hair. Wei Ying lets his head tip forward a little more, eyes fluttering closed as he lets a soft noise slip free.
hopefully that doesn't stop Lan Zhan, because this is the most at peace Wei Ying has felt in months and he honestly does not want it to stop.]
hopefully that doesn't stop Lan Zhan, because this is the most at peace Wei Ying has felt in months and he honestly does not want it to stop.]
[ s q u i n t s.
that sounds like a lie there, Lan Wang Ji. and not a very believable one at that. Wei Ying blinks a few more times, as if he expects Wang Ji to yell 'kidding!' before he speaks.]
But-- I was sitting improperly? I mean, for Gusu Sect rules at least.
that sounds like a lie there, Lan Wang Ji. and not a very believable one at that. Wei Ying blinks a few more times, as if he expects Wang Ji to yell 'kidding!' before he speaks.]
But-- I was sitting improperly? I mean, for Gusu Sect rules at least.
[All things must end in time, but that doesn't mean that Wang Ji won't enjoy those he can while he can. Perhaps, though, they can revisit this task in the future if it brings Wu Xian peace. He would do anything to bring Wu Xian some kind of peace.
When his fellow tilts his head back and a soft sound escapes, Wang Ji's lips quirk minutely. He's never seen Wu Xian like this, so quiet and pleased and vulnerable, outside of sleeping. It's- nice to see this side of him. And Wang Ji respects that vulnerability with a ginger touch when working along the hairline. He smoothes his fingers along Wu Xian's forehead, just below the shoots of hair, to keep them from pulling when he combs through them.]
When his fellow tilts his head back and a soft sound escapes, Wang Ji's lips quirk minutely. He's never seen Wu Xian like this, so quiet and pleased and vulnerable, outside of sleeping. It's- nice to see this side of him. And Wang Ji respects that vulnerability with a ginger touch when working along the hairline. He smoothes his fingers along Wu Xian's forehead, just below the shoots of hair, to keep them from pulling when he combs through them.]
[You may need to wait years for for Wang Ji to ever say the words "just kidding." Wang Ji is already aware that he's messed up, that he's slipped, but it's not Wei Wu Xian's fault. It is his own. For not squashing these feelings long ago. He can't seem to keep his words straight so he stops saying them altogether, electing instead to answer with silence.]
[ Lan Zhan has never seen Wei Ying like this because he has never been like this before with anyone. well, only Yanli has ever seen him so vulnerable, so without his usual defences. but his bright smile and sharp tongue are nowhere to be found right now, instead, he is content to just exist and feel. and he feels-- oh fuck he feels a lot.
but he can't really concentrate on that, because then Lan Zhan's hands are pressing against his skin a little harder and Wei Ying is positively melting at the sensations. his back presses against Lan Zhan's legs and he knows he should move, he honestly does, but it all feels so mind-numbingly good he can't bear to move.
so he doesn't. relaxes with a quiet sigh of 'Lan Zhan' and a soft shiver.]
but he can't really concentrate on that, because then Lan Zhan's hands are pressing against his skin a little harder and Wei Ying is positively melting at the sensations. his back presses against Lan Zhan's legs and he knows he should move, he honestly does, but it all feels so mind-numbingly good he can't bear to move.
so he doesn't. relaxes with a quiet sigh of 'Lan Zhan' and a soft shiver.]
[ look, he thought he would have to wait a thousand years to hear Lan Zhan say he was sorry, so he isn't sure about that any more.]
Lan Zhan, are you feeling okay?
[ he is leaning across the table now, hand outstretched to press against Lan Zhan's cheek, as if to check for fever.]
Lan Zhan, are you feeling okay?
[ he is leaning across the table now, hand outstretched to press against Lan Zhan's cheek, as if to check for fever.]
[wangji leans back in an instant, sword hand rising to catch his fellow cultivator's wrist before it touches his face. it's. unacceptable that he can't seem to cool his emotions, that his jealousy has spilled out where all can see. but he can't spur it on further.]
Fine.
Fine.
[Perhaps they should have stopped before they started. Perhaps Wangji should not have insisted. Several principles have been broken, especially now with Wei Ying leaning against him, but he doesn't stop. This comforts Wangji as well, to see Wei Ying as quiet and peaceful as this. If only all of their time together could be spent like this.
Alas, they do have plans.
The comb slows as it traces its last few paths through Wei Ying's hair, as Wangji attempts to draw out the last moments of peace and quiet, but soon comes to a complete stop. Careful not to move too much, Wangji sets the comb beside him and then brushes through Wei Ying's hair with his fingers, wrapping sections in the front into a bun.]
Alas, they do have plans.
The comb slows as it traces its last few paths through Wei Ying's hair, as Wangji attempts to draw out the last moments of peace and quiet, but soon comes to a complete stop. Careful not to move too much, Wangji sets the comb beside him and then brushes through Wei Ying's hair with his fingers, wrapping sections in the front into a bun.]
[ there are times, especially times like this, where something flickers to life in Wei Ying's chest and floods into his veins like smoke. it is only ever with Lan Zhan, only ever when something like this happens, something that feels almost otherworldly, dreamlike, that he feels it. as if he needs to figure something out, and it is right there if only he could reach it.
but it always slips away, mist between his fingers, and Wei Ying wonders if Lan Zhan does it on purpose or if it is all in his own head.
it doesn't matter, not now, Wei Ying hums as the comb is traded for fingers and his eyes flutter open slowly. when he speaks his voice is thick and slow, warm at the core of it all.]
... don't go overboard, Lan Zhan. Not unless you want me to be asking you to do my hair all the time.
[ he means it teasingly, but at the same time, he finds himself then thinking about that. about Lan Zhan doing his hair for him each morning, the soft and quiet ritual to begin the day and--
the feeling flares brighter again. Wei Ying ignores it.]
but it always slips away, mist between his fingers, and Wei Ying wonders if Lan Zhan does it on purpose or if it is all in his own head.
it doesn't matter, not now, Wei Ying hums as the comb is traded for fingers and his eyes flutter open slowly. when he speaks his voice is thick and slow, warm at the core of it all.]
... don't go overboard, Lan Zhan. Not unless you want me to be asking you to do my hair all the time.
[ he means it teasingly, but at the same time, he finds himself then thinking about that. about Lan Zhan doing his hair for him each morning, the soft and quiet ritual to begin the day and--
the feeling flares brighter again. Wei Ying ignores it.]
....
[ do you see this face? it is the face of someone who really does not believe you at all. Wei Ying stays there, frozen half over the table with Lan Zhan's fingers wrapped around his wrists and just stares. looks and watches and tries to put it together. ]
Ah! I get it!
[ at least he thinks he does. ]
You're upset that I have more skills than you at something when we have been equal all along! It's okay Lan Zhan, I can teach you if you want!
[ do you see this face? it is the face of someone who really does not believe you at all. Wei Ying stays there, frozen half over the table with Lan Zhan's fingers wrapped around his wrists and just stares. looks and watches and tries to put it together. ]
Ah! I get it!
[ at least he thinks he does. ]
You're upset that I have more skills than you at something when we have been equal all along! It's okay Lan Zhan, I can teach you if you want!
Edited (squints at the random line SHRUGS) 2019-12-23 02:47 (UTC)
[please do not mind the bead of sweat that traces along the lines of wangji's face. or how tightly he clenches his jaw. he must be so blatant and obvious, the odour of wangji's crime so fragrant that wei ying has now figured it all out.
except.
except not at all.
wangji stares, brow furrowed deep into his nose as he makes no reply for a moment or two, utterly dumbfounded. and yet quietly curious. to learn such things would break a dozen different principles. but how long has he stared at those lips and wondered how soft they might be. or how wonderful it might be to see them form his name and his alone for the rest of his life.
he releases wei ying's wrist, fingers peeling off all at once, and folds his hands in front of him on the table.]
except.
except not at all.
wangji stares, brow furrowed deep into his nose as he makes no reply for a moment or two, utterly dumbfounded. and yet quietly curious. to learn such things would break a dozen different principles. but how long has he stared at those lips and wondered how soft they might be. or how wonderful it might be to see them form his name and his alone for the rest of his life.
he releases wei ying's wrist, fingers peeling off all at once, and folds his hands in front of him on the table.]
[Wangji exhales softly, a hint of a smile piquing his lips. If he had his way, he would do this every day, if just to bring peace to Wei Ying, to calm the restlessness that swirls around him. The warmth in Wei Ying's voice is mirrored in Wangji's,] Of course.
[With an expert touch, he loops Wei Ying's hair through and over, catching stray pieces of hair with his long fingers. Tucking back the bun, he wraps the crimson ribbon around the base to secure the tresses in place. Except. That's not quite right.
Wangji leans forward, pulls two strands free in the front, like he used to when he was younger. They frame Wei Ying's face, melt away the years of hardship, remind Wangji of a time when Wei Ying sleeping during lecture was his greatest worry.
There. Done. But Wangji doesn't move to retrieve the robe on the bed, or to disturb Wei Ying in any way.]
[With an expert touch, he loops Wei Ying's hair through and over, catching stray pieces of hair with his long fingers. Tucking back the bun, he wraps the crimson ribbon around the base to secure the tresses in place. Except. That's not quite right.
Wangji leans forward, pulls two strands free in the front, like he used to when he was younger. They frame Wei Ying's face, melt away the years of hardship, remind Wangji of a time when Wei Ying sleeping during lecture was his greatest worry.
There. Done. But Wangji doesn't move to retrieve the robe on the bed, or to disturb Wei Ying in any way.]
[ if only Wei Ying was facing Lan Zhan and could see the smile, he treasures the hints of them that he gets from the other all the time. hordes them actually, keeps them stored in his heart for those days when the spirits are particularly resentful or everything seems that much more difficult.
but he misses it, just hums and lets a smile of his own curl his lips as his hair is pulled with the utmost softness and care into a simple bun, sees a flicker of red as his ribbon is tied in, and they are done.
at least he thinks they are, but then there are fingertips against his forehead and Wei Ying is leaning into that touch unthinkingly, seeking it, and-- oh.
oh, Lan Zhan--
Lan Zhan remembered. remembered and liked it enough to pull the hair-free in a way that he was sure had always bothered the other, when they were back studying, because it was messy. not as messy as the simply ponytail he had sported for a few short summers, but close. unkempt and in his face. but Lan Zhan...
the feeling comes back, stronger than before and Wei Ying finds himself seeking Lan Zhan's gaze, eyes wide, searching. ]
Lan Zhan....
but he misses it, just hums and lets a smile of his own curl his lips as his hair is pulled with the utmost softness and care into a simple bun, sees a flicker of red as his ribbon is tied in, and they are done.
at least he thinks they are, but then there are fingertips against his forehead and Wei Ying is leaning into that touch unthinkingly, seeking it, and-- oh.
oh, Lan Zhan--
Lan Zhan remembered. remembered and liked it enough to pull the hair-free in a way that he was sure had always bothered the other, when they were back studying, because it was messy. not as messy as the simply ponytail he had sported for a few short summers, but close. unkempt and in his face. but Lan Zhan...
the feeling comes back, stronger than before and Wei Ying finds himself seeking Lan Zhan's gaze, eyes wide, searching. ]
Lan Zhan....
[ honestly, Wei Yin is grinning brightly but also waiting for Lan Zhan to draw Bichen and threaten to end him for improper conduct or something. but that-- never happens. instead, Lan Zhan lets go of his wrist and then just--
sits there.
like Wei Ying didn't just offer to teach him how to give blow jobs (who is he kidding, he has no idea, but he has read some porn and has a very healthy imagination and honestly? how hard could it really be?).
okay, so--]
Ah, but Lan Zhan! Have you ever even kissed someone?
[ he says it loud and exuberant, but also like he is worried. like that somehow matters oh-so much. (it kind of does. to Wei Ying, though he can't figure out why.) ]
sits there.
like Wei Ying didn't just offer to teach him how to give blow jobs (who is he kidding, he has no idea, but he has read some porn and has a very healthy imagination and honestly? how hard could it really be?).
okay, so--]
Ah, but Lan Zhan! Have you ever even kissed someone?
[ he says it loud and exuberant, but also like he is worried. like that somehow matters oh-so much. (it kind of does. to Wei Ying, though he can't figure out why.) ]
No. [wangji nearly blurts out and ‘of course not’ to follow but bites his tongue. he’s never had another friend, much less one as close as wei ying or one as kind and handsome either. to wangji, there is no other for him but wei ying, his match in swordsmanship, in wits, in all but this one thing: experience.
he thinks again about how many people wei ying must have kissed, how many he’s-
wei ying is popular with the other students, while wangji is decidedly not. in the past that would never have bothered him, but now? now that jealousy flares in his gut, bites and chews at him.]
he thinks again about how many people wei ying must have kissed, how many he’s-
wei ying is popular with the other students, while wangji is decidedly not. in the past that would never have bothered him, but now? now that jealousy flares in his gut, bites and chews at him.]
[Wangji's name drifts up to his ears and he slowly tilts his gaze down toward Wei Ying. He already looks stunning, just as he is. The extra strands pulled down over his face do not detract, but instead add to the feral beauty that emanates from Wei Ying. Instead of moving to continue the process of readying, Wangji finds himself caught, tied in by the red string of fate that links them together after all these years.]
Yes? [He asks, voice low, little more than a whisper, reserved only for Wei Ying to hear in this private place.
Wangji should have finished long ago; Wei Ying's hair did not require much in the way of styling. Yet, here he remains, with Wei Ying's back against his legs, neither of them moving.]
Yes? [He asks, voice low, little more than a whisper, reserved only for Wei Ying to hear in this private place.
Wangji should have finished long ago; Wei Ying's hair did not require much in the way of styling. Yet, here he remains, with Wei Ying's back against his legs, neither of them moving.]
[ that was-- well maybe it was the answer that Wei Ying expected. as beautiful as Lan Zhan was, he also wasn't the most approachable person in the world. but he was certain that at least one brave soul had at least tried. honestly, how could they not?
the shock is evident on Wei Ying's face (and something warm and pleased curls in his belly, but now is not the time for introspection).]
Really? But Lan Zhan is so handsome! Surely someone has tried! Maybe you just didn't notice someone trying to court you, ahh that would make sense.
[ because, seriously, that is the only thing that makes sense to him. never mind the fact that he is an actual idiot. ]
the shock is evident on Wei Ying's face (and something warm and pleased curls in his belly, but now is not the time for introspection).]
Really? But Lan Zhan is so handsome! Surely someone has tried! Maybe you just didn't notice someone trying to court you, ahh that would make sense.
[ because, seriously, that is the only thing that makes sense to him. never mind the fact that he is an actual idiot. ]
[ for a moment, time seems to stop. it is just Wei Ying and Lan Zhan and nothing else; no cultivator world straining at the seams, no expectations from clans, no need to move for the funeral that will not wait. right now, for the first time in a long while, Wei Ying feels seen, right to his nonexistent core. it is terrifying and exhilarating all at once because if anyone were to see him, why wouldn't it be Lan Zhan.
Wei Ying opens his mouth, but for once isn't sure of words, so he closes it, eyes still fixed on Lan Zhan.
a heartbeat, then two, and Wei Ying has to jerk himself away from Lan Zhan before he crawls into his lap (what the hell was that thought? why would he--? Lan Zhan would stab him)
the laughter that he forces out sounds winded.] Ah, Lan Zhan, I almost fell asleep there. You're really good at that.
[ a smile, sharp and unsteady. then, quietly, honestly:] Thank you.
Wei Ying opens his mouth, but for once isn't sure of words, so he closes it, eyes still fixed on Lan Zhan.
a heartbeat, then two, and Wei Ying has to jerk himself away from Lan Zhan before he crawls into his lap (what the hell was that thought? why would he--? Lan Zhan would stab him)
the laughter that he forces out sounds winded.] Ah, Lan Zhan, I almost fell asleep there. You're really good at that.
[ a smile, sharp and unsteady. then, quietly, honestly:] Thank you.
[No. No, not even the bravest souls have tried. Wangji has had to interest in anyone since he came to an age where those urges exist. No one attracted his interest until- until they snuck in with liquor and matched him in battle. Since he fell asleep in lecture and sent a talisman his way. At first, Wangji had assumed the sensation was annoyance, but over time he found the heat in his gut developing into something else.
Something deeper and unfamiliar. Something that warped his composure and sank into his core.]
No. [He repeats, because he is very sure. While he may seem entirely aloof, he is not unobservant.]
Something deeper and unfamiliar. Something that warped his composure and sank into his core.]
No. [He repeats, because he is very sure. While he may seem entirely aloof, he is not unobservant.]
[Wangji stares down at Wei Ying, at those bright eyes gleaming up at him. Peaceful. Content. And Wangji wants to hold this moment forever, to hold Wei Ying like this eternally, but then Wei Ying moves, jerks away. Swallowing down the mote of anxiety that springs forth on his tongue, Wangji stays right where he finished, hands slowly curling back into their usual place behind his back. The compliment earns no reaction, sounds empty, but the gratitude earns a glance back up.
Nodding, his lips quirk minutely and he steps around to the bed to retrieve the white robe. Yes. That's right. They're going to a funeral today. They might already be late.]
Nodding, his lips quirk minutely and he steps around to the bed to retrieve the white robe. Yes. That's right. They're going to a funeral today. They might already be late.]
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