No. [wangji nearly blurts out and ‘of course not’ to follow but bites his tongue. he’s never had another friend, much less one as close as wei ying or one as kind and handsome either. to wangji, there is no other for him but wei ying, his match in swordsmanship, in wits, in all but this one thing: experience.
he thinks again about how many people wei ying must have kissed, how many he’s-
wei ying is popular with the other students, while wangji is decidedly not. in the past that would never have bothered him, but now? now that jealousy flares in his gut, bites and chews at him.]
[ that was-- well maybe it was the answer that Wei Ying expected. as beautiful as Lan Zhan was, he also wasn't the most approachable person in the world. but he was certain that at least one brave soul had at least tried. honestly, how could they not?
the shock is evident on Wei Ying's face (and something warm and pleased curls in his belly, but now is not the time for introspection).]
Really? But Lan Zhan is so handsome! Surely someone has tried! Maybe you just didn't notice someone trying to court you, ahh that would make sense.
[ because, seriously, that is the only thing that makes sense to him. never mind the fact that he is an actual idiot. ]
[No. No, not even the bravest souls have tried. Wangji has had to interest in anyone since he came to an age where those urges exist. No one attracted his interest until- until they snuck in with liquor and matched him in battle. Since he fell asleep in lecture and sent a talisman his way. At first, Wangji had assumed the sensation was annoyance, but over time he found the heat in his gut developing into something else.
Something deeper and unfamiliar. Something that warped his composure and sank into his core.]
No. [He repeats, because he is very sure. While he may seem entirely aloof, he is not unobservant.]
Are you sure, Hanguang-jun? You barely notice me and I am always annoying you, what makes you think you would notice someone trying to get your attention if they were shy~
[ don't look too closely at how he says that, how he is maybe a little of something annoyed almost seems to sink into the words. Wei Ying refuses to think about it thank you. he has more important things to focus on that are not his own weird emotions, those can wait. for years, he is sure.
leaning over the desk a little more, Wei Ying reaches out to tug on Lan Zhan's robes, eyes alight.]
Don't worry, Lan Zhan! I can help you with that too, if you want!
[Lan Wangji looks away, slightly off into the middle distance at Wei Ying's response because that persistence led to the friendship they have now. No one else has had nearly the patience to deal with constant cold. Xichen encouraged Wangji to make friends and yet the only companion he spent much time with was Wei Ying.
When fingers tug on his robes, Wangji turns back toward Wei Ying, heart pounding at the sudden lack of distance. His ears pinken as he presses his lips into a line.] Help what?
[Because he wants to make sure what ground they're standing on before he does anything else. Please let it be kissing.]
[ he says it shamelessly, and like he has so much experience himself that he might be able to impart such wisdom onto others. well, as far as anyone was concerned, he did have experience. he was incredibly good at faking it after all, and really, he seriously doubts that Lan Zhan is actually going to let him kiss him.
in fact he is confused as to how he has not drawn Bichen just yet. or thrown him out physically, Wei Ying is fairly sure that he could.
(doesn't question why he is pushing this so much, why he almost wants to try. wants to kiss Lan Zhan. oh gods, he wants to kiss Lan Zhan.)
one moment, Wei Ying might just be freezing on the spot, fingers curled in Lan Zhan's robes while he tries to process that thought.]
[the wait is almost as deadly as the implication of the fingers curled in wangji's robes. that drop of sweat winds down along his jaw and slips beneath his collar, sending a chill dancing down his spine. he expects wei ying to continue- wants him to for the pit in his stomach- but wei ying freezes.
and so does wangji. his heart stops in his chest, his lips part with his heavy breath, his eyes focus entirely on wei ying's face.
maybe- maybe wei ying really doesn't want to kiss him. maybe this teasing has once again led to the inevitable conclusion. hanguang jun has once again been too stiff, too unlikable. xichen advised him to make friends, but- but what if he was simply not someone worthy of having a friend? maybe ever?
finally, he glances down and away. lips returning to a thin line. he should have known this was all for play.]
[ oh Wei Ying is not playing, not this time. he is just processing. well, maybe processing is a bit much of a word, he is coming to terms with the fact that nearly everything he has done up to this point in his life has been to get Lan Zhan's attention. well, not everything, but everything that he has done so far within Cloud Recesses and beyond. he teases and taunts and is loud so that Lan Zhan will look at him. because he wants those eyes on him and only him and he wants to kiss Lan Zhan and no one else and--
he really really does not want to teach Lan Zhan how to kiss other people. that thought makes him feel sick to his stomach.
making a little noise that is a terrible mix of so many, Wei Ying nearly falls onto the table when he suddenly realizes that he needs to breathe and not just-- stare at Lan Zhan. who is now frowning and no no no that is not what he wants at all. Wei Ying moves so that he is on his knees beside Lan Zhan, fingers still curled in his robe as he opens his mouth and closes it a few times. he looks lost for a moment, before:]
Lan Zhan-- Can I-- are you sure it's okay I kiss you?
[ he sounds unsure of himself. because as much as he doesn't want to teach you how to kiss other people if this is the only chance he gets, he is going to take it. ]
[wangji settles himself at last. his heartbeat steadies and slows, his fingers fold at his waist. this has just been another game, another teasing glance, another whisper of something he cannot have. to have wei ying sit so close, fingers curled in his robe, and the gesture mean nothing is heartbreaking. but he has faced rejection before, he has knelt in the cold waiting before.
he should have expected.
the noise that rises from wei ying is unexpected and wangji looks up to meet the gaze so firmly set on him. wei ying seems lost, uncertain, so unlike his usual self.
and then the question comes.
all of a sudden life breathes back into wangji, his heartbeat pounds once more, his hands fight to stay neatly folded where they should stay. but he can't help it. he has wanted to do something, anything, with wei ying since the lanterns. he knew he wanted to protect wei ying with his life and guard him and love him. now he has this chance and he will not waste it.
wangji allows his hands to rise to wei ying's, to close around them with a gentle squeeze.]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
he thinks again about how many people wei ying must have kissed, how many he’s-
wei ying is popular with the other students, while wangji is decidedly not. in the past that would never have bothered him, but now? now that jealousy flares in his gut, bites and chews at him.]
no subject
the shock is evident on Wei Ying's face (and something warm and pleased curls in his belly, but now is not the time for introspection).]
Really? But Lan Zhan is so handsome! Surely someone has tried! Maybe you just didn't notice someone trying to court you, ahh that would make sense.
[ because, seriously, that is the only thing that makes sense to him. never mind the fact that he is an actual idiot. ]
no subject
Something deeper and unfamiliar. Something that warped his composure and sank into his core.]
No. [He repeats, because he is very sure. While he may seem entirely aloof, he is not unobservant.]
no subject
[ don't look too closely at how he says that, how he is maybe a little of something annoyed almost seems to sink into the words. Wei Ying refuses to think about it thank you. he has more important things to focus on that are not his own weird emotions, those can wait. for years, he is sure.
leaning over the desk a little more, Wei Ying reaches out to tug on Lan Zhan's robes, eyes alight.]
Don't worry, Lan Zhan! I can help you with that too, if you want!
no subject
When fingers tug on his robes, Wangji turns back toward Wei Ying, heart pounding at the sudden lack of distance. His ears pinken as he presses his lips into a line.] Help what?
[Because he wants to make sure what ground they're standing on before he does anything else.
Please let it be kissing.]no subject
[ he says it shamelessly, and like he has so much experience himself that he might be able to impart such wisdom onto others. well, as far as anyone was concerned, he did have experience. he was incredibly good at faking it after all, and really, he seriously doubts that Lan Zhan is actually going to let him kiss him.
in fact he is confused as to how he has not drawn Bichen just yet. or thrown him out physically, Wei Ying is fairly sure that he could.
(doesn't question why he is pushing this so much, why he almost wants to try. wants to kiss Lan Zhan. oh gods, he wants to kiss Lan Zhan.)
one moment, Wei Ying might just be freezing on the spot, fingers curled in Lan Zhan's robes while he tries to process that thought.]
no subject
and so does wangji. his heart stops in his chest, his lips part with his heavy breath, his eyes focus entirely on wei ying's face.
maybe- maybe wei ying really doesn't want to kiss him. maybe this teasing has once again led to the inevitable conclusion. hanguang jun has once again been too stiff, too unlikable. xichen advised him to make friends, but- but what if he was simply not someone worthy of having a friend? maybe ever?
finally, he glances down and away. lips returning to a thin line. he should have known this was all for play.]
no subject
he really really does not want to teach Lan Zhan how to kiss other people. that thought makes him feel sick to his stomach.
making a little noise that is a terrible mix of so many, Wei Ying nearly falls onto the table when he suddenly realizes that he needs to breathe and not just-- stare at Lan Zhan. who is now frowning and no no no that is not what he wants at all. Wei Ying moves so that he is on his knees beside Lan Zhan, fingers still curled in his robe as he opens his mouth and closes it a few times. he looks lost for a moment, before:]
Lan Zhan-- Can I-- are you sure it's okay I kiss you?
[ he sounds unsure of himself. because as much as he doesn't want to teach you how to kiss other people if this is the only chance he gets, he is going to take it. ]
no subject
he should have expected.
the noise that rises from wei ying is unexpected and wangji looks up to meet the gaze so firmly set on him. wei ying seems lost, uncertain, so unlike his usual self.
and then the question comes.
all of a sudden life breathes back into wangji, his heartbeat pounds once more, his hands fight to stay neatly folded where they should stay. but he can't help it. he has wanted to do something, anything, with wei ying since the lanterns. he knew he wanted to protect wei ying with his life and guard him
and love him. now he has this chance and he will not waste it.wangji allows his hands to rise to wei ying's, to close around them with a gentle squeeze.]
Yes.